My carving.

June 4, 2016

I've been working with a Spiritual mentor since January of this year.

 

One of the things we've explored is my "Sacred Wounding". What is the wounding that's been created in this life and how can I receive the gift of it, honor it, and share it as Spiritual Medicine for others?

 

I thought this would be an intellectual process of thinking it through, having the wounding come to me in my mind and then have an *aha moment - "Yes, that's it!".

 

Wrong.

 

It came through in experience and reflections all around me. It came through in my relationship with Josh. It came through in friendships. It was painful, deep and challenging to go there and to let the inquiry unfold through me.

 

So, what did I come to? Isolation.

 

As an only child and a child of divorced parents, I spent a good amount of time alone. And one of the biggest gifts in this is that I learned steadfast independence. This isolation also birthed in me a DEEP desire for creating community and a sense of family all around me.

 

As I dove deeper into this word "isolation", I remembered instance after instance where my inner belief of isolation was actually me CREATING isolation. Story after story, reflection after reflection of my inner world and dialogue of "I don't belong", "I'm not wanted", "I don't fit in", "I don't have a place". Ouchy.

 

Then I looked up the word "Isolated" on Google, for deeper exploration and I found these definitions:

Adj.
-Far away from other places, buildings, or people; remote
-Having minimal contact or little in common with others
-Single; exceptional

 

Look at the last one - Exceptional!! How's that for a reframe? A new, empowering way to see this word, completely shifting the energy.

 

Next, Satya asked me to contemplate some questions about my Sacred Wounding. This one in particular I want to share because it awoke something profound within me:

 

How did this wounding carve me out, making me empty enough to be a vessel for the divine energy that heals?

 

If my wounding if a gift to myself and others (which it is, because I choose to create it as such), then my experiences carved me out to be a vessel to feel and perceive the greater wound.

 

What does that mean? It means that in my aloneness, in my isolation, in my sadness, I was experiencing the COLLECTIVE wound of separation. What I was feeling was not only my own, but the pain of others too.

 

With that realization tears started streaming down my face, the irony of all of this bursting open within me, like a spiritual purifying rain. Even in my feelings of aloneness I'm actually experiencing the collective Unity. How beautifully intricate. How incredibly individual and at the same time Unified we all are. What a beautiful, strange and exciting experience it is to be alive on Earth in this body.

 

Sending out this sweet prayer to the Universe:
With every breath I take today, may all beings feel their sense of connectedness.
May all beings experience the divinity of their uniqueness and the divinity of their oneness simultaneously.
May we all embrace each other as Soul Family, with open, loving hearts.
May my sharing be healing medicine for all <3

 

 

 

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About Erinn

Hi, I'm Erinn, the creator of this little world.

I'm a San Diego native, a fiery Leo, color maiden, magic revivalist, body conversationalist, and rainbow gangster.

 

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